That Moment…

…that moment when you find out for certain that the one person in the world who held your heart, who you would have changed everything about yourself for, who you secretly wished would one day want you again if only you could make yourself good enough for them has gotten married and will never again look at you, want you, care for you, love you, let you rest your head on their shoulder, hold you while you cry, keep you safe from your nightmares, make you laugh, put you first, make you feel special, make you feel beautiful…that moment when you realize your dream, however stupid and far fetched is not even a dream anymore but a delusional fantasy…that moment when that new knowledge makes you want to simultaneously give up and work harder…that moment when you want to curl up and hide and at the same time explode with rage and frustration…that moment when you realize you will be alone forever…that moment when you think you’ll be ok with it but you try to log on to wordpress to write a quick post and the page won’t load and let you type and the inability to type brings you to tears and makes you want to fling your laptop across the room and has you punching the armrest and making sounds of rage in your throat that alarm the cat but aren’t loud enough to reach through the walls to your neighbours…that moment when you realize you are not ok but don’t know where to turn…that moment…

its ok

 

 

Advertisements

4 thoughts on “That Moment…

    1. foodobsessed79 Post author

      Hi Naddieh,
      Thanks. 🙂 When I wrote that I had so much stuff going on inside I just did, what is it called, free writing? And that’s what came out lol As soon as I saw that pic I knew it was meant for this post, it was perfect and spot on. Thanks for reading. 🙂

      Reply

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s